Updates

Tanner O’Malley

Not much can be said for ol’ Tanner O’Malley. Aside from the fact that he wore a nice coat. Long and grey, with seven buttons up the middle. Sensible pockets that fastened and zipped. Even one on the inside, the kind to hide a map, with a pouch inside of that, to hide a treasure’s key. The collar was built to accentuate the cheekbones, its angles mysterious like Atlantis magicians. Opposite that collar, a custom-split tail. For a wider range of mobility than one would ever need.

I know it as the coat that brought Tanner his wife, whose charm and whose beauty was the prolix talk of fairytales.

She spotted it one day while he was out for a walk, through the window of a rental across the street from her church.

Every morning through that window, in a steaming soak of suds, she’d watch the sunrise as it climbed up the steeple and bombarded with blessings her most bona fide parts. Though that window had a curtain, it was seldom that she pulled it, and the window she left open for the steam to roll outside. She liked to stand their for moment and inhale the fresh air while clearing fog from the panes of both the window and her dreams.

And through those very panes is how Tanner first appeared, collecting litter from the church’s rainy-day flooded grounds, singing hymns like an angel taking care of the world.

In any other coat he would have caught the pneumonia, and accepted her sympathy along with her tea. But, “Oh no, ” said Tanner, rolling up his fancy pants to wade through a puddle for an empty plastic bag. “You’d be hard-pressed to catch a cold with this quality.” Then he went on at length about its waterproofed layers and how tornadoes were no match for its windbreaking shell.

Awfully impressed and halfway in love, with Tanner’s next words, she knew she’d found the One. “How about I walk you home and let you try it on?”

Two months later– A lavishly magical wedding. At the church where they met, with families flown in, the preparations alone would have cost a king his crown. They’d even trained doves to bear both their rings and coast in from the sun as it set down the steeple.

The picture-perfect proceeding went according to plan until Tanner discovered he was absent one detail. His bride had assumed that marriage meant equal, and the coat from vows-on would belong to them both. So it was unbeknownst to Tanner that a wardrobe exchange had been planned with I-Do’s, and it was much to his surprise that she had really strong hands.

“Easy, pumpersnickle. What’s with all the tugging? I know the fabric’s wrinkle-free, but you’re acting like a savage.”

This marked the only time his bride was seen pouting. “Tanner O’Malley, you wore it down the aisle, I want to wear it back!”

Pain flooded Tanner in the form of realization: They hadn’t yet taken one unionized step and she’d already regressed into a Stone Age barbarian.

“But baby,” he said, “I need it for the pictures–to accentuate my cheekbones. Now take your hands off before I punch you in the face.”

They stood there a moment, their fresh marriage frozen, dead on the alter, the bible still warm–and then up came the knee, garter-belting his manlies, with just enough fuss to make the audience erupt.

Shaking their fists, they egged them both on.

Tanner, doubled-over, rolled up his jacket’s cuffs–which were perfect in circumference, an afterthought from Italy–and sank a mouthful of teeth into a stocking thigh-high.

This merited from the crowd the most thunderous applause, and the fury that followed was not regulation.

She cupped his ears, he gouged her eyes, and they brawled from the alter their way back up the aisle with His and Hers spectators standing on chairs–they were fast-pitching rice like enemy combatants–the confetti cannon was emptied and reloaded with silverware…

Never before had a post-nuptial war publicly garnered such toxic attention. Friends were calling friends. Families called extendeds. The minister called the cops–who called for all to freeze.

When freeze they finally did, almost everything went silent. Save for the sound of two lover doves, singing to the tune of Happily Married.

The butterflies heard it and danced in on their song. Then, almost as if they knew what was needed, they landed gently on the rings of now husband-and-wife.

Ooh’s and ah’s from the crowd laid a blanket for the newlyweds, who were again finding each other for the very first time.

They remembered together how they met and fell in love:

Her glance through the window at a trash-picking angel–his servicing the church, singing songs in the rain–the offer of tea, returned with a coat–its luxurious pockets, for a treasure map and key . . .

With his heart sailing off on the swells in eyes, Tanner popped up his collar like an agent of romance, swooped his bride off her feet the way good husband does, and took her to China with a Tiananmen Suplex the way you’d expect from a Communist red.

The bride and the crowd were both caught by surprise, for the unsportsmanlike move was long banned as “too deadly.”

But Tanner O’Malley was lost beyond rage–and this wasn’t the time to be playing by rules. No. This was the time for Old Testament fire and brimstone: This was the time for the Olfactory Slipknot. And that’s what he gave her, as a gentleman would…

It was noon the next day before the melee had stopped, the church no longer standing–one big, smoking hole.

And not a trace could be found of the beautiful proceeding, the people who attended, or much of the town.

Just a few loveable creatures that came in from the woodlands, possessed as new vessels by yester-raised demons–tasked with obtaining the fabric that danced away with the breeze after parting the bloody mist of a matrimonial séance without brandishing so much as a blemish or stain.

“Hard Headed Woman”
— Elvis Presley

Licentious Intentions: A Shipwreck (the dirty mick) Series, No. 7

“Tell Me Mary”
–Tomorrows Bad Seeds

Purchasing two hundred portals to manifest cannabis is what I’d consider a natural progression.

. . . Because the cannabis market I’ve always excelled in is now slowly but surely legally budding; because the search algorithm that’s captured my interest is ripe for a conquering midway through transition; and because I’m a bad-ass tactician with elephantiasis of the ballsack and an insatiable yearning to cash-in on my piety . . .

Fondling my computer with no witnesses present, I skip with the schmooze and get straight to the breeding: “What do you say, baby? You wanna make a hybrid?”

<Proceed to Checkout?>

Click.

<Please confirm your purchase.>

Click.

<Congratulations! You now own the following domains…>

Consider the venture a form of guerilla-grow: I’ve staked parcels of land to plant industry resources, up-to-date articles, price guides and reviews. All of which fertilize landings, nurture page rankings, and provide fecund soil to sprout fiscal opportunities. Opportunities I’ll mature to help me branch my way through networks and identify those needing to be clipped, cured or cloned.

Among the URLs I’ve harvested are the industry’s golden arches: I bought 420-everything, including all the states.

Also I discovered, in Trademark Registration, a club for cannabis enthusiasts is seeking protection in the US of A. Because I’ve always been a fan, and their application is still “pending,” I secured their national .coms and priced the package at fifty grand. I also acquired the links that I suspect they’ll need to franchise, if ever they decide to, one in each state. Those have been marked at twelve hundred per, a steal that makes me feel like we’re already friends.

All-in-all, for ten bones a play, I’m of the mind to think I did good.

A thought that’s quickly leveraged by an email from the registrar–and now I have mixed feelings.

<You forgot to use coupons!>
…

“Maaaan–” Saint Bizzy is processing my newest endeavor behind the venue he likes to play on our off-weeks at home. “I don’t really understand it, but it definitely sounds like some shit that Shippy would get into.”

Also partaking in our alleyway session, a talented duo, in from out of town.

Stax is laughing at Bizzy and fixing the blunt, burning uneven and making Case antsy. Case keeps pointing at the run, trying to assist, and catching Stax’s flack for the work he’s done already. “This is why Case isn’t allowed to roll. Don’t even let him try. He can’t roll for shit.”

Team Ponics is like the Mexican version of Bizzy and I: Disproportionate in size–the little one is dangerous–they partner weekends on the road to run their music game. We only differ in that they both work as artists, and I’m Bizzy’s tour manager (or so we like to say).

I don’t actually manage. Bizzy is self-sufficient. He books his own shows, supplies his own merch, and doesn’t present much of a need for the skills I’m known to hone.

Thankful for that, his tour is my vacation. I use it to relax on the weekends and entertain my wants. Which can vary quite radically between cities and venues. Same with the array of fame-fuckers and hustlers, good local eats and weird stoner love.

The van that we road with is what makes our shit official. Wrapped with his face, my brand, and a few random sponsors, we get tittied in traffic and photoed when stopped. It’s essentially a billboard when driving through cities, a beacon to party that one can park anywhere.

Saint Bizzy proposed we tour when I was going through some things–well before the funeral, not to be confused. An implosion at home called for Damage Control. My job was the opposite of “quietly make friends.” I flew east afterwards to unwind with some family. And then Boston was terrorized, and the news took effect:

I bought a ticket to New York
to try and sneak into Boston.
Up all night, convinced,
I would be wrong
not to.

An intervention in the morning:
No hunting for terrorists.
Earmarked, forever,
that feeling is
queued.

Later that week, Bizzy on the phone: “Shippy, man, you need to relax. I’m trying to tour this year. You wanna help make it happen? You can bring a set, maybe rock a few shows… Whatever you wanna do, man. Just say the word.”

Even though Bizzy and I were never really friends before that, I welcomed the offer, flew home and bought the van.

Now, there’s a lot of reasons that touring can suck–nerves start to wear, people can be shitty, and a lot of bad things just happen in general–but that’s everywhere with everyone. And Bizzy and I together, we just take it as it comes.

Team Ponics we met at a Washingon show and invited them to Vegas the following the month. It was a janky little bar sporting holes from a Glock, and for everyone involved, a complete waste of a time. Back at the casino, hotboxing our room, we swapped a few notes and got on to some trade.

When I asked Case, undocumented and employed by a slaughterhouse, to give a demonstration of his signature move, he spewed milk from his nose before describing wholeheartedly the extent of his artistry when dispatching cattle. It was less a question I asked than a formal acknowledgement, a communication between psychopaths that starts the competition.

Said competition started, this how it went:

I managed to book a party on the elevator with a septuagenarian mogul. It took me eleven floors, and I had to work around his bodyguard, but by the time the doors opened to reveal Team Ponics–who were headed towards their room when they stalled by the elevator–my new friend Rollo was ready to buy a club. “Well goddamnit, Shipwreck! Let me clear these hookers on outta my room and you can bring your boys on over for drinks.”

After we left Rollo’s, Case karate kicked a guy in the casino restaurant’s bathroom. He was approached from behind while blow-drying his hands by someone he assumed to be assailing him with a taser.

And then–

Three in the morning, there on the Strip, slinging CDs like some modern-day buskers: “Holy shit! Team Ponics and Bizzy?!” All the elements were present to commence with their training: A crowd full of drunks, an insidious fan, and a city that feeds on the ill-prepareds’ soul.

Embedded in their bodies from the dinosaur days was an instinct that told them to pick up the pace. But running from the spotlight only draws more attention–and the crowd, an organism moving in flux, even under heavy impairment knows how to prevent them.

Surveying their options barrage-deep in photos (two flashes got it going, the others knew to follow), they decided they’d escape through a cluster of ladies. An amateur move no match for a Jedi. “Hey! Where you going?” I screamed frantically. And then, pleading, while maintaining volume: “My girlfriend’s a model. She’s your biggest fan. You can’t do this to me, man. She wants to suck your dicks!”

It really didn’t matter that the three of them were nobodies. Fear of missing out is like a brawl-call for vagina: It’ll clear a Sea-Tac bench all the way from LAX. It’s the apex predator’s most prominent compulsion.

Hard to say exactly what happened after that. I got hungry for a burger, and wasn’t taking calls.

But they were all there when I woke up in morning. Along with Case’s new procurement of blunt-impact sporting goods

“Five Minutes, guys.” Somebody’s passing a message from the alleyway door. Their timing coincides with our fingering a stub.

The bar is mostly filled with supportive friends and family. Ours and other locals’, who came to warm the show.

Inside is an acquaintance that I distanced for a while. Her babies’ daddy is on the books for nine hundred with interest. After a decade, it’s getting pretty steep.

Bittersweet, the fact he’ll pay but never know.

Lucky for him.

His girl’s my biggest fan.

“Hip Hop Hooray”
–Naughty By Nature

First Amend This!: An IDOC Newsletter, Mar. 2021

Previous: First Amend This!: An IDOC Newsletter, Feb. 2021

WELCOME to the March issue of First Amend This!

Brought to you by The Captive Perspective and made available at bookofirving82431.com. This publication provides an insider’s look at issues affecting the Idaho Department of Correction community.

If you wish to assist this effort, share the link, cut and paste, or print and send a copy to another.
…

GET INVOLVED

IDOC will be holding monthly Townhall With Leadership meetings all through 2021. Submit your questions to brightideas@idoc.idaho.gov using the subject line “Qs for leadership,” and be sure to attend the meetings to keep the conversation going.

Offender friends and families interested in networking concerns are encouraged to join the Idaho Inmate Family Support Group (IIFSG) on Facebook, or contact them at idahoinmate@gmail.com.
…

EDITOR’S NOTE

In case you missed it last month, we’ve started another book drive. Our goal this time? Persuading institutions of higher education to try and write off their outdated course materials as donations to prison libraries.

That said, contributions from anyone are welcome, so long as they are sent from a retailer or publisher in accordance with IDOC’s mail policy.

Ship to:

Patrick Irving 82431
IMSI
PO Box 51
Boise, ID 83707

This month’s contributions were gifts from FAT! friends and family. They are as follows:

Thanks everyone! We appreciate the thoughtfulness.

Let’s First Amend This!
…

AN UPDATE ON THE CORECIVIC CONTRACT

Last month we submitted a public records request for the contract IDOC signed with CoreCivic prior to transferring residents to a private facility Eloy, Arizona. Initially we aimed to post the contract for reference, the same way IDOC did with the GEO contract in 2018, but when our request was returned with over 500 pages, we decided to offer it here instead, over time and in pieces. The idea is to highlight the important bits first, and then collect feedback and concerns to direct our focus as needed.

We find this necessary because the 2018 contract required of GEO very specific policies–the same ones stipulated in the new arrangement with CoreCivic–but GEO failed to comply and were held to no account. That is, until the Texas Commission of Jail Standards took interest, following a presentation titled Violations Of Texas Minimum Jail Standards, which was compiled and presented from Idaho Max.

Unfortunately for those housed in Arizona, Arizona is without a similar commission to offer independent oversight. Meaning they’ll be relying on IDOC monitors who visit temporarily and have a history of ignoring noncompliance issues.

Which is why we’re asking that questions and issues presented from Arizona be communicated to the Idaho Inmate Family Support Group as well as the Department. Working together, we can audit Saguaro Correctional Center’s daily operations and, when they get there, Florence Correctional Center’s too.

Of specific interest to us this month:

1) If the disciplinary process abides by IDOC Policy 318.02.01.001
2) If the grievance process abides by IDOC Policy 316.02.01.001
3) If restricted housing abides by IDOC policy 319.02.01.001
4) If GED materials and testing have been made available
5) If there are work opportunities
6) To what extent programming is available
5) How much rec is offered daily

Your keeping in touch is appreciated.
…

ANOTHER STAFF-INVOLVED INCIDENT AT IMSI

Violence erupted in A-Unit in late January. The incident, which involved approximately ten inmates and an unknown number of staff, took place after a group of residents, upset by recurring cancellations of rec and limited time spent out of their cells, attempted to protest by not celling up and, “without warning” were subject to spray.

Last August an article titled “Assaults On Staff Appear To Be Increasing” was censored several times on its way to publication. The question it asked was, “Why the sudden trend?”

Admins of the Idaho Inmate Family Support Group reported after the January incident that they weren’t informed of events taking place.

This publication does not encourage violence.
…

FOR THOSE STILL WAITING ON THEIR 2020 STIMULUS PAYMENTS

Millions of others are too. Chances are you need to file again.

According to IRS.gov: “If you’re eligible for the credit, and either we didn’t issue you any Economic Impact Payments or we issued less than the full amounts, you must file a 2020 tax return to claim the Recovery Rebate Credit even if you are not required to file a tax return for 2020.”

Late last year, after the courts ruled them eligible, the incarcerated were allowed to file a simplified 1040 to apply for 2019’s Earned Income Payment. This year, when filing a complete return, they’ll want to pay special attention to the instructions for Line 30: Recovery Rebate Credit to receive whatever amount is missing from their payment(s).

Filing can be done online or by mail, and facility paralegals will provide the 2020 forms.

[Sources: Alice De Nisco Rayome, CNET.com-personal-finance/stimulus-check-tax-credit-heres-how-to-get-your-missing-payment-on-your-2020-refund. IRS, Tax Year 2020 1040 and 1040-SR Instructions, pg. 59.]
…

PELL GRANTS RETURN FOR THE INCARCERATED

It was the Crime Bill of 1994, backed by then-Senator Joe Biden and President Bill Clinton, that did away with higher education funding for the incarcerated. And it was the Pandemic Relief Bill of December 2020 that saw Pell Grants for the incarcerated return.

The benefits are sure to be noticed at state and federal levels, as those who enroll in higher education programs while in prison are 43% less like to recidivate within three years of being released, according to a study done by the RAND Corporation. While they attribute the statistic to better employment opportunities and higher working wages, offering the brain exercises for critical thinking is likely also a contributing factor.

Director Tewalt has announced that IDOC will be working with local institutions to offer degree-granting programs throughout Department facilities.

[Source: Editorial Board, “Felons Are Again Eligible for Pell Grants. It’s About Time,” washingtonpost.com ]
…

IDAHO SUPREME COURT RULES ON PRISONER EMPLOYMENT

This just in–

Despite Idaho Code §20-209 stating the Board of Correction “shall provide for the care, maintenance and employment of all prisoners,” the Idaho Supreme Court ruled in August that pro se plaintiff Dan Goodrick has no rights to paid or unpaid employment.

According to February’s issue of Prison Legal News, the court noted that, while §20-209 makes providing prisoners with employment mandatory, it doesn’t define “employment.”

And then they went on to deliberate like this:

§20-242A . . . 72 Idaho Code . . . “prisoners are not employees” . . . they are just conducting “labor prescribed by the Board” . . . because of I.C. §20-101: forced labor and slavery . . . Correctional Industries Act I.C Sections 20-242A and 20-408 . . . the Board is merely authorized to make employment in the program available . . . “§20-209 did not create a right of paid or unpaid employment for prisoners or establish employer-employee relationship between the Board and any prisoner” . . . yada, yada yada . . . No dice.

We salute Mr. Goodrick for his efforts.

[Source: Matt Clarke, “Idaho Supreme Court Holds Prisoners Have No Right to Paid or Unpaid Employment,” Prison Legal News, Feb. 2021.]
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WRONGFUL CONVICTION ACT LIKELY TO PASS

Following the Senate Judiciary and Rules Committee’s recommendation to pass the Wrongful Conviction Act, the Senate voted in favor, and weeks later, the house.

The bill aims to provide compensation for the wrongly convicted, some of whom appeared in front of legislature to offer their testimony.

Last year’s version of the bill was vetoed by Governor Brad Little, despite only one member of legislature voting against it. Senator Doug Ricks of Rexburg, the bill’s sponsor, is confident this year’s version is one that Little will approved.

If this year’s bill is approved by Governor Little, claimants stand to be awarded $62,000 for each year of wrongful incarceration–$75,000 if they were on Death Row–and an additional $25,000 for each year of parole.

[Sources: Sally Krutzig, “Wrongful Incarceration Act Passes Senate,” postregister.com. KIVI Channel 2 News.]
…

SENATOR C. SCOTT GROW ATTEMPTS TO SOIL MARIJUANA DECRIMINALIZATION FOREVER

Senator C. Scott Grow of Eagle, in an attempt to preempt compassion for medicinal marijuana, introduced a bill to ban psychoactive substances forever, citing an interest in preserving the moral integrity of a state surrounded by cannabis-advanced economies and medicinal treatments.

Reports that he’s a faith-healer have yet to be confirmed.

Senator Grow welcomes your feedback.
…

FAIR EMPLOYMENT ACT PRESENTED AGAIN

House Representative Lauren Necochea is again pushing the Ban The Box bill. Reintroduced this year as the Fair Employment Act, the bill aims to prevent employers from requesting applicants disclose felony convictions prior to an interview. The goal is to prevent interviews from being denied to qualified candidates who have been branded by a felony conviction in their past.

Among those opposed to the bill last year, Senator C. Scott Grow, who argued that giving felons a second chance could bring harm to small business.
…

LIEUTENANT NICODEMUS WINS NATIONAL AWARD
By Cpt. Dagoberto Martinez

The Veterans of Foreign Wars has selected ISCC Lieutenant Tyler Nicodemus to receive this year’s prestigious Police Officer Award.

Every year the award goes to an individual belonging to a municipal county, state, or federal unit tasked with enforcing law as it pertains to their area of responsibility in emergency services, law enforcement or firefighting.

Congratulations Lieutenant Nicodemus, on your hard-earned recognition.
…

COVID NEWS

Over 24,500 tests have been administered to IDOC residents in three states. More than 4,200 have identified positive and a total of six deaths have been reported as COVID-related.

Idaho’s incarcerated population has yet to be listed with priority for incoming vaccinations. With jury trials scheduled to resume March 1, attorneys, physicians and judges all agree that without the incarcerated receiving vaccinations, community health and safety will be jeopardized by due process.

Erin Sheridan of the Idaho Press nicely summarized criminal justice advocates’ concern with packing courtrooms full of the unvaccinated: “…the criminal justice system has a primary obligation to ensure that a system intended to rectify wrongdoing does not place the lives of those in its custody further at risk.”

ACLU Idaho and the law firm Shearman & Sterling remain in close contact with IDOC while monitoring all forms of COVID-related issues. Those with concerns are invited to participate in the dialogue by forwarding their COVID experiences to:

ACLU Idaho
PO Box 1987
Boise, ID 83701

IDOC has yet report any more testing for those housed at Saguaro Correctional Center.

Following an IMSI inmate worker showing positive in February, a full worker unit was quarantined and the entire facility tested.

View IDOC’s COVID numbers here.

[Sources: Erin Sheridan, “Advocates Call for Vaccinating Inmates to Stem COVID-19 Spread,” Idahopress.com. IDOC COVID Tracker.]
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RENICK ON THE RADIO

With over 100 episodes available for streaming, Mark Renick hosts Victory Over Sin, on KBXL 94.1FM, Saturdays at 12:30 pm.

At the end of January Mr. Renick hosted Robyn W. Vander Waal, the director for the National Association for Rational Sex Offense Laws (NARSOL).

In February he welcomed Dr. Julie Compton, an executive leadership coach and author of the book “Rise To The Top.”

Also in February, Idaho’s 19th District House Representative and Assistant Minority Leader Lauren Necochea, who recently appeared at The Reentry Conference, and presented to legislature this year’s Fair Employment Act.

Learn more about Renick and his efforts @ Systemic Change Of Idaho and imsihopecommunityphaseii.com.
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SICI CELEBRATES THE RETIREMENT OF INSTRUCTOR MARY ELLEN NOURSE
by Administrative Assistant Leeann Cochems

Mary Ellen Nourse received love and praise for her over twenty years of correctional instruction.

She started out at CCA and, ten years ago, brought her talents to IDOC.

Dedication is the word that comes to mind when it came to teaching her students. She pushed herself and others to succeed. She implemented Job Service SICI and worked tirelessly, invested in her students’ success. She has a quick wit and brightens the room with her colorful outfits and positive attitude. Her happiness and laugh are infectious. She has an amazing life force and was the life of the party when it came to the SICI morale task force.

Mary Ellen has a long list of things to do now that she is retired. She plans on spending time with her husband, continuing teaching as a volunteer and playing the accordion and organ at church. As a long-distance runner, she also plans to improve her standing long jump and shotput distance.

I’m sure she will think of a few more things to do before she gets her first retirement check.

Congratulations Mary Ellen Nourse, you will be missed by all!
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ICIO’S DRUG DOG RETIRES AFTER SEVEN YEARS OF SERVICE
by Lt. Greg Heun

Tucker, a lab/pit mix drug drug, started his duties with the Department in July of 2016, after being trained by Sergeant Jerry Walbey of the Garden City Police Department.

When Tucker came to ICIO, he was put under the supervision of Officer Cheryl Davis. For over four years Tucker and her went everywhere together. Those who visited ICIO when Cheryl was working Central Control were probably greeted by Tucker at the ICIO entrance drawer.

Upon Tucker’s retirement, formal adoption procedures were taken, and he continues to live with his ICIO master, Officer Cheryl Davis, but spends much less time in Central Control. One thing that caused his retirement was his hips becoming weak. A drug dog does lots of jumping, getting their noses close to potential high-positioned hiding places, which causes a lot of strain on the hips.

My first meeting with Tucker was at a North Region CNT meeting. Tucker entered the room and went straight to my right-side coat pocket, where I had a piece of deer sausage in a baggie. He returned to that pocket many times at later meetings.

Back in 2016, when Tucker was new at his job, he drew controversy when he discovered and old stuffed rabbit in the ICIO training room and tore it apart. I took a picture of him acting very guilty, with the rabbit scattered in pieces behind him, and labeled the pic “Bad Dog! No Biscuit.” Many staff disagreed with my assessment and commended Tucker for ridding the training room of the ugly stuffed toy.

May Tucker enjoy his retirement.
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A BOOK REVIEW

This month we absorbed Emotional Intelligence 2.0, written by Travis Bearberry and Jean Greaves. An almost pocket-sized guide containing 66 methods for dealing with emotions creatively while understanding the path they travel towards reason.

“Emotional intelligence” is a term the authors use to describe one’s overall ability to employ strategies for self-awarenes, self-management, social awareness and relationship management. One can expect 255 pages of wisdom, inspiration and practical advice that will help hone the skills needed to benefit relationships throughout life, both personal and business.

The following passcode, good for one person, can be used by the first person to visit the Emotional Intelligence Appraisal® at talentsmart.com/test: EQ4AXV3NDX

Thank you Diamond and the IIFSG, for allowing us to donate this book to the IMSI library.
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INMATE SERVICES AT WORK

“JPAY Trouble Ticket 2-24-21”

Re: Your efforts to capitalize on Black History Month.

In a message you sent the beginning of last month, you promised our DOC 25 movies of cultural significance, centered around historical events and individuals renowned, to be available for entire the month of February, all at the compassionate price of $3.99.

Your offer, on the surface, was a classy display of proprietorship. But when our population visited the category “Black History Month,” the titles available numbered just six. Of those six, I Am Ali, Race, The Blind Side, and From The Rough were offered at the price of $3.99. Pacific Rim and Pacific Rim: Uprising, however, which are both movies that focus on the tribulations associated with piloting gigantic robot fighters during an alien apocalypse set somewhere in the future, were priced above the others at $6.99.

While I certainly admire Idris Elba as an actor, and I’m sure he will be of historical significance in the future as a highly accomplished alien fighter who used his robot war machine piloting skills to save our favorite planet, I can’t help but feel offensively targeted by your political ambitions, and the way you’ve propagandized your stance on immigration reform.

Please walk me through your intent to instill within me radical thinking, the reason you’ve charged us $3 more, and the desecration you’ve planned for our Cinco de Mayo.

Regards,
Patrick Irving
Inmate Services
bookofirving82431.com
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SUGGESTION BOX

The John Hopkins Center for Public Health Preparedness has developed a Coursera curriculum for psychological first aid, and made it available for free online. Because such courses help to sustain or enhance the psychological resilience required to weather the daily toll of activity restrictions people have experienced since the arrival of COVID, I suggest the same course could be of use in prisons, where trauma and activity restrictions have always run rampant.
…

That’ll do it for the month. Stay safe, everybody!

“Stranger”
–The Devil Makes Three

Next: First Amend This!: An IDOC Newsletter, Apr. 2021

How To Get Evicted From Prison, No. 11

“May the palette to paint a picture of antiquated modern fixtures arresting the development of those who need it most find me and assign me the building up and redefining of all the things that one is capable against the will of their host.”
— #0000082431

My early morning shower is the highlight of my day. Because the rhythm of the water offers me solace, and the steam an escape from sobriety’s reign. If salvation can be found, it will be found in the rain nook, alone and underwater, where my brain is free to range.

Right now, I’m sacredly swimming through the depths of thought and ritual, attempting to distill from the vapors some tangible meaning to replenish through my veins all the life that I’m bleeding.

For the moment I’ve forgotten that our people that have abandoned us, loaded us on a plane headed deep in the South and delivered us to GEO for privatized punishment. For the moment I’ve forgotten that I’m crammed into filth, packed into a room with twenty-two others for a sluggish procession of time-thieving days.

For the moment I’ve forgotten.

Forgotten.

Forgotten for the moment that–

I have been forgotten.

Beating against the curtain, the water drowns out all the noise.

“Hey! What the fuck are you doing?!”

Usually, anyway–

“Call your backup then, motherfucker! We’re not dealing with this today!”

Usually the water drowns out all the noise.

Begins another battle that I’m sure to lose with buoyancy:

The oxygen
opposes me,
forcibly inflating my lungs–
too quickly comes the surface…

It’s time to start the day.

I turn the nozzle till it squeaks and stick my head out of the shower.

A wayward regiment of corporate malefactors is raiding our village in pedestrian force: trifling obnoxious, accosting our bunks, not a pack or a herd but a parody of mongrels–nefariously armed with box-cutting switchblades, adamantly attacking inanimate lines as if deemed by an admiral our enemy stronghold.

As makeshift tents fall to the floor and get swept in the current of underfoot rage, I find that rudely constructed partitions of linens fare no better in battle than Alamo Texans.

Someone asleep has woke from their bunk and signaled the others with expletive yelling.

A sergeant is telling him he’s going to the Hole, and ordering an underling to “go on and grab him.”

Cuffs in his hand, his legs don’t want to move. His apprehension is triggering everyone’s senses.

Both sides of the room begin wading through foment: the trepidation, swelling, is sure to prove costly.

“He’s not going to the Hole,” says the younger of the brothers, our herald from Max. He’s standing in the way with an irritant smile, bearing the fruit that only blossoms with violence.

His elder, by his side, won’t let him feed alone. “No one here is going to the Hole!” It’s an order to us and a warning to them. And the heat from its service springs an atmosphere change.

Those of ours wearing shirts begin taking them off, revealing as they do deadly scars and tattoos–histories told without anyone speaking: among us are killers whose demons were sleeping.

Opportunities, family, and affection from loved ones–those are the reasons back home we behaved.

Here there are none.

No Fucks To Give.

Just adrenaline–spiking–send it around.

With half of ours now protecting the target, and the other half, in their underwear, lacing up their shoes, I wrap with a towel and walk to my bunk. Where a uniformed stray is making a mess.

He’s a little too young to be scared and out of place, and I’m all but excited to catch him raiding red-handed. Quickly I surmise the only thing that he’s taken is an unhealthy interest in the seat of my underwear. “What do you think, man? Smell clean enough?”

“Huh?” As confused as he is, he’s easy to startle. And the radio on his shoulder is broadcasting Hell. Blaring by his ear in a bout of schizophrenia, cracked, cackled calls are screeching wrong directions. Much feedback is coming from his counterparts’ grouping–defensively huddled, they’re all calling for help.

In a concious decision he offers them none.

I point at the briefs in his hand but he’s focused on the door, silently praying that backup is coming. Because he’s awfully out of place and obviously uncomfortable, I ask if his mother knows how he pays her bills: “¿Cuántas parajes sexuales tiene?”

“What?”

Realizing the barrier between us goes far beyond language, I lift my foot to the bunk for an industrious stretch, and direct his attention to my issue with the towel. “The thread count seems to be all right, but there’s bound to be a problem without having any leg holes.”

“Oh. Sorry,” he says, instructing his grip to relinquish my drawers.

“No worries,” I say, and lose the towel with a wink.

When both legs are finally invested, I nod towards the commotion, nonsexually prodding: “So, what’s with the bullshit?”

“Seguda,” he spits: The Comeuppance of Curse Words.

Of course–

Because of the laundry.

Yesterday, someone’s laundry was hanging from the ceiling, using the cool push of a vent to recover from a soak. Seguda sprung her leash and started barking all irate, promising to confiscate anything left when she curly-tailed back after making her rounds. The owner of the apparel was quick to take it down. He was also quick to sit at a table with a spoon and the beans they brought for noon and grievously streak both sides of his undies before strategically returning them right back where they hung.

Then, he pushed his face between the bars that make the hallway window and obnoxiously lobbied as loud as he could: “Seguda! They don’t respect you. SEGUDA! They said you won’t confiscate shit! You’re gonna have to show ’em you mean business.”

When Seguda returned to the scenic display, she found herself greeted by an animated foreground. “Behold!” said the squishy face wedged between bars, flinging an arm to route her attention. Behind it, flapping from the ceiling in the flow of the vent: one loud, lonely pair of prison-issue underies, evincing one’s reeling from the wrong kind of rampage while flying as the flag set to consecrate our parish.

“I tried to tell ’em,” he said. “I said, ‘If you guys wanna keep ’em, you better take ’em down.’ Do you think they listened to me? Hell no. They ain’t got no respect for you, woman. But I guess there ain’t shit on a shingle you can do about that…”

Our straight faces struggled. We prayed her coming in.

She stood there and processed for a good solid minute, but equine in her menses, she sensed enough to spook. “You think I don’t get it? You WANT me to confiscate them, don’t you? Ha. Ha. Very funny, guys. I’m not falling for that one.”

And then she steered away like an old wobbly bovine.

Right to the notebook, we’re learning. Where, to the morning shift’s tasks, she added fucking up our day.

“Makes sense,” I say, pardoning the youngster.

“Yeah,” he says. “She’s a real cowhole.”

The sound of boots makes its way down the hall.

Opening the door, it’s canisters first. There must not have been time to grab the good equipment. Or maybe they’re hoping a dozen is enough.

Closest to the door, it’s my job to greet them. “Mornin’.”

They’re itchy on the trigger but don’t really want to spray us. Not without masks or proper ventilation. Chances are it’d do more harm than good. Even with the tears and the snot and the choking on puke, the shock value is lost when you’ve eaten enough–and it’s hard to imagine more than a few of theirs have.

Because no one appreciates being threatened with an ordnance, “What the fuck you wanna do?!” is the chorus from our crowd.

With the weight of the chaos distributed equally, “Okay,” says the sergeant, cautioning all moves. “It wasn’t our choice to come in here like this. We were just following orders. Let’s all relax and take a moment–”

“Our moment-taker’s broken, motherfucker! Get the fuck out of our house.” Some types of guys are only tough in a crowd. And those are usually the guys that have the best lines. Because for years they’ve been rehearsing while awaiting their moment. Watching them shine is often times cute.

“Okay.” The sergeant’s open hands are held where we can see them. “We’re going to leave, but we’ll talk about this later. In the meantime, you guys can’t hang your laundry between your bunks like that. Okay?”

The brothers agree with it sounded out fair. “You hear that guys? No more hanging your laundry like that.” — “Yeah guys. Did everybody learn their lesson?”

“Yes,” moans our crowd.

“And we have to take this,” says someone’s mother, hoisting the bag full of liquid we were brewing in the trashcan. Third day in, it was coming along swell.

A look from the sergeant makes sure we understand.

Of course we understand. We’ll have to brew another.

As their parody of mongrels evacuates our unit, the juice that was cooking gets handed to the youngster. He’s told to find a trashcan and throw it away. “And make sure it’s not the one that they were just using.”

He’s the last one to leave, and our unruly crowd is accosting him gently–all underwear and sneakers and the power of telepathy. “Sorry, guys,” he says, lingering at the door. “You heard it. They gave me an order.”

And then, removing the lid from the can in foyer, he deposits the brew in its bag in the trash by the door, and allows our man closest to keep it from closing.

It’s nothing less than a fine display of sportsmanship.

The kind that makes us proud to adopt him as our son.

“Back Door Man”
–The Doors

First Amend This!: An IDOC Newsletter, Feb. 2021

Previous: First Amend This!: An IDOC Newsletter, Jan 2021

WELCOME to the February issue of First Amend This!

Brought to you by The Captive Perspective and made available at bookofirving82431.com. This publication provides an insider’s look at issues affecting the Idaho Department of Correction community.

If you wish to assist this effort, share the link, cut and paste, or print and send a copy to another.
…

GET INVOLVED

IDOC will be holding monthly Townhall With Leadership meetings all through 2021. Submit your questions to brightideas@idoc.idaho.gov using the subject line “Qs for leadership,” and be sure to attend the meetings to keep the conversation going.

Offender friends and families interested in networking concerns are encouraged to join the Idaho Inmate Family Support Group (IIFSG) on Facebook.
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EDITOR’S NOTE

IDOC did good this month. It’s possible, in fact, that IDOC does some good every month, and that I, much like the rest of society, spend too much effort equating their existence to the worst that they’ve done when positive reinforcement might encourage more of the good stuff.

Call me crazy, but along those lines I decided to piece together an issue with the assistance of staff*, and present a state department comprised of individuals, who, at the end of the day, are (mostly) just less criminal versions of ourselves. Versions that get to leave prison every day and go home to their families, only to have muster the will to voluntarily come back. This alone conveys some kind of commitment–and not the kind you’d expect from your typical sadist.

Many of you may not know that, to his lawyers, this editor commonly expresses something like gratitude, for aside from some shadiness aired in the past, the Department has done well to tolerate his freedom of speech, however inappropriate at times he may be. Considering the stressors and horrors reported by others who’ve publicly dissented from their own DOCs, kudos are owed to the staff I see daily for having have never given me reason to think that I’m treated unfairly.

Of course, I can’t say that without saying this: F*ck you, GEO! We know what YOU did.

With that out of my system, this month of thunder belongs to IDOC, and I’m privileged to be the guy that no one asked to bring it to you.

So, without further ado, let’s First Amend This!

*In no way has this presentation been sanctioned. The editor simply has an understanding of Fair Use and copyright law. Meaning this issue’s staff articles came courtesy of idoc.Idaho.gov. (A site we recommend to our correctional community.)
…

FOLLOWING LAST MONTH’S ISSUE

Solutions were implemented at IMSI to allow RHU residents daily use of the outdoor rec modules. Due to issues related to COVID, access prior to this change was restricted to every other day. This resident credits the change with improvements to his mental- and physical health.

Lunch portions at IMSI were addressed. It was noted that COVID played a factor in the menu change. With distributors unable to meet product demands, staff said they adapted to the best of their ability.

Our requests for public records have been returned with helpful instructions to expedite the process. We look forward to making those records available as soon as we get them.

A series of confiscated mail mishaps have been addressed, and extra staff has been assigned to prevent the issue from recurring in the future.

We thank IDOC for their efforts, and we are hopeful to report more positive changes soon.
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TVCRC RESIDENTS DONATE GIFTS TO ST. LUKE’S CHILDREN’S HOSPITAL

by TVCRC Manager Amy Welsh

Residents at the Treasure Valley Community Reentry Center participated in a fundraiser organized by Corporal Mike Dorris, ultimately raising more than $1,000 and providing 171 gifts to Santa’s Toy Box at the St. Luke’s Children’s Hospital.

Santa’s Toy Box is an annual event at St. Luke’s Children’s Hospital, which aims to minimize holiday pressures for families of sick children by allowing parents of patients to “shop” free of charge and select a gift for each child in the family.

Due to the quarantine status of TVCRC’s residents, toy donations were delivered by Cpl. Dorris, Sgt. Davina Lau, Case Manager Christopher Contreras and Case Manager Shelbie Webb, who report that St. Luke’s staff greatly appreciated these generous donations from our residents.

The willingness of TVCRC’s residents to give to those in need will help provide a much happier Christmas to our community, whose families are experiencing very difficult circumstances.

We took great pride in wishing a very Merry Christmas from everyone at our TVCRC.
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IDOC BUDGET INCREASE

IDOC is poised to see a budget increase of just .7% for the next fiscal year, the smallest increase, according to legislative budget documents, in over a decade. Under Governor Brad Little’s proposal, just $1.8M will be added to the budget from last year, making the total to be appropriated from state and general funds $283.1M.

With last year’s increase a whopping 12.6%, and a ten-year average of 6.7%, legislative budget analyst Jared Hoskins is cautious to point out that this year’s diminutive budget boost may not hold if the $8.3M saved from Medicaid expansion has to be added back to departmental expenses should the expansion be repealed.

Additionally, while facility populations have decreased from 9,027 at IDOC’s fiscal start of 2019 to 8,775 at that of 2020’s, the decrease correlates with courts delaying trials to avoid the spread of COVID. According to Director Tewalt, compared with last year, the number of people waiting in county facilites for transport to IDOC has seen a substantial drop. But once people are able to be sentenced and processed, those Department numbers will effectively change.

During a January 19 budget hearing, held by the Joint Finance-Appropriations Committee meeting, Idaho Senator Steve Blair of Blackfoot agreed: the Department’s projections have yet to account for COVID’s judicial stand-still.

In the same meeting, State Representatives Caroline Nilsson Troy of Genesee and Colin Nash of Boise voiced concerns that county property taxes were seeing indirect raises to accommodate the ever increasing Correctional budget. They also noted that it costs local facilities more to maintain when their capacities increase with holds destined for State.

The planned budget increase will allow IDOC to conclude the multi-million dollar replacement of their Offender Management System. The cost of adding 130 beds added to the St. Anthony’s work camp is also included in the proposal.

Source: Betsy Z. Russell, “Idaho Prisons Could See Smallest Budget Increase In a Decade,” idahopress.com.
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D-5 STAFF HELP SANTA DELIVER DESPITE COVID

by Employee Unknown

During a home visit, SPPO Nikkia Liles was speaking with one of LPPO Taylor’s client’s child. The child mentioned that Santa could not make it due to COVID this year, though he might try and mail something to them. SPPO Liles advised her TAC Officer LPPO Julie Taylor of what she was told and they encouraged and rallied P & P employees in D-5 to “make Christmas happen for these kids,” writes D-5’s Marie Hoffmier.

Marie says the children’s father was overcome with emotion when he learned of the generosity of the D-5 staff.
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FAT! BOOK DRIVE

ATTN: Institutions of higher education. If you’re no longer using your outdated materials, please consider sending them our way.

And to everyone else: We’re currently seeking books, preferably therapeutic or cerebral, to be reviewed by our editor and donated to the IMSI library. Contributions must be sent from a retailer or publisher to the address below in accordance with IDOC Mail Policy.

Patrick Irving 82431
c/o FAT! Book Drive
IMSI
PO Box 51
Boise, ID 83707

Last month we received the following contributions from Diamond Guitar-Judd of the Idaho Inmate Family Support Group, the Asheville Poetry Review, and our beloved editor’s ingrate family. To all those who’ve taken an interest in our development and emotional well-being, we very sincerely thank you!

Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradbury and Jean Greaves
The New Jim Crow by Michelle Alexander
The PTSD Workbook by Mary Beth Williams Ph.D., LCSW, CTS and Soila Poijula Ph.D.
Wife After Prison by Sheila Bruno
Asheville Poetry Review by Various Authors
Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson
The Three Body Problem by Cixin Liu
The Proud Highway: Saga of a Desperate Southern Gentleman by Hunter S. Thompson
2018/19 Prison Lives Almanac–Prisoner Resource Guide Edition
How To Invent Everything: A Survival Guide For The Stranded Time Traveler by Ryan North
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DISTRICT 7 STAFF SERVE MEALS AT THE IDAHO FALLS SOUP KICHEN

by District 7 Probation & Parole Manager Glenda Thomson

Lead PO Joyce Cumpton, PO Natalie Lloyd, PO Kasey Champion, Section Supervisor Dan Ziegler, Section Supervisor Lanny Taylor and District Manager Glenda Thomson prepared, packaged and served spaghetti lunch to the community and to the residents at the Community Crisis Center.

The Idaho Falls Soup Kitchen recently posted on Facebook that they were in need of volunteers, and this team stepped up without hesitation.

Not only did they serve food [for the day], but they signed up to do a few more days in the new year to keep the Soup Kitchen functioning.
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SIX RECEIVE YEARS OF SERVICE CERTIFICATES AT ICIO

by ICIO Lt. Greg Heun

Corporal Larry Jones received his 20-year certificate. Larry has worked numerous duties at Idaho Correctional Institution-Orofino. In the past he spent some time at Special Projects and was an original member of the North Region Honor Guard (recently retired from the team).

Deputy Warden Kent Shriver received his 25-year certificate. Over the past 25 years, Kent performed many duties for the department. Prior to his promotion to deputy warden, Kent was on the North Region Correctional Emergency Response Team (CERT), serving just short of 20 years. He finished his duty as the CERT commander.

Food Service Supervisor Margaret Hight received her 10-year certificate. Margaret started out as an officer and, with her talents, moved into the FSS position at ICIO. Margaret is also a member of the North Region Crisis Negotiation Team and has been on the team over four years.

Sergeant Sergio Medrano received his 5-year certificate. Sergio has worked most positions at ICIO and has been on the North Region Correctional Emergency Response Team (CERT) for most of his time in the department. He currently is the Assistant Shift Commander, A-Nights.

Corporal Cheri Mozley received her 10-year certificate. Cheri is a past member of the North Region Honor Guard team and currently is the ICIO Special Projects Corporal and oversees maintenance of the ICIO/Projects vehicle fleet. Her mother, Jeanne Moss, after 20 years retired this month from SICI Special Projects.

Corporal Candie Burgess received her 15-year certificate. Candie has worked most positions at ICIO and is a past member of the North Region Honor Guard team. She is currently the Response and Escort Corporal on A-Nights.
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MOSS RETIRES AFTER 20 YEARS

by Administrative Assistant LeeAnn Cochems

Correctional Officer Jeannie Moss’s retirement was celebrated December 9, 2020, at the Southern Idaho Correctional Institution, honoring twenty years of dedicated service.

Warden Noel Barlow-Hust and her leadership team expressed a deep appreciation for Moss who, at one point, was one of very few female correctional officers at IMSI and a trailblazer for women in corrections.

Moss spent much of her IDOC career as a member of the SICI Vocational Work Projects Team.

Lieutenant Stephen Grill and the projects team recognize her incredible dependability, work ethic and demonstration of great leadership.

Moss’s family, who are also IDOC employees, were standing by as Warden Barlow-Hust and Lt. Grill presented her recognition of service awards for a job well done.

Best wishes, Jeannie, you will be missed!
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WE REGRET TO INFORM YOU

The librarian at ISCC was charged last month for having felonious sexual contact with an inmate.

A 63-year-old sergeant was charged last month with first degree stalking. Hired by the department in 2001, the sergeant has since been placed on administrative leave and is temporarily relieved of his duties in Boise.

An IMSI resident found hanging in their cell January 10 passed away January 12, despite life-saving efforts. The thirty-seven-year-old’s death was investigated as a suicide.
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COVID NEWS

Over 21,500 tests have been administered to IDOC residents in three states. More than 4,000 have identified positive, and six inmate deaths have been reported as COVID-related.

ACLU Idaho and the law firm Shearman & Sterling remain in close contact with IDOC while monitoring all forms of COVID-related issues. Correctional clients with concerns are invited to participate in the dialogue by forwarding their COVID experiences to:

ACLU Idaho
PO Box 1987
Boise, ID 83701

IDOC’s SCC population hasn’t seen any more testing since they first arrived to the Arizona facility with a large number of infected cohorting among them. Other DOCs sharing the facility reported an explosion in cases following Idaho’s arrival.

IDOC staff have been sharing their vaccine experiences over social media to help promote the safety of the vaccine prior to the Department receiving their allotment.

View IDOC’s COVID numbers here.
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CONTRACTS

According to the Clearwater Tribune, the Board of Clearwater County Commissioners entered into a Work and Financial Plan Agreement with the IDOC Vocational Work Project and the Idaho Correctional Institution in Orofino on January 4.

Details of the contract are currently unknown.
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RENICK ON THE RADIO

With over 100 episodes available for streaming, Mark Renick hosts Victory Over Sin, on KBXL 94.1FM, Saturdays at 12:30 pm.

This month, Renick hosted a clinical social worker and a representative of the Veterans Justice Outreach Services to discuss the challenges people face with incarceration, and to share resources available to Veterans through the VA. Working with community partners, the VA’s Justice Outreach Program has much to offer in the way of housing-, mental health- and employment services.

According to VA.gov: “The mission of the Veterans Justice Programs is to identify justice-involved Veterans and contact them through outreach, in order to facilitate access to VA services at the earliest possible point . . . [this is accomplished] by building and maintaining partnerships between VA and the key elements of the criminal justice system.”

In a January 16 interview, author and Gonzaga School of Law Professor George Critchlow discussed topics related to his book “The Lifer and the Lawyer: A Story of Punishment, Penitence, and Privilege.” Written in collaboration with Michael Anderson, and described in one review as “an aging Black man who grew up poor and abused on Chicago’s South Side,” the book is said to read like a memoir, detailing Anderson’s neglected youth, crime spree, trials and life imprisonment.

Critchlow can be reached to contribute to the ongoing discussion of sentencing, rehabilitation, and the racially disparate treatment of minorities at georgecritchlow.com.

On January 23, Reentry Specialist Stephanie Silva and District 7 Manager Glenda Thomson joined Mark to discuss the annual Idaho Falls Recover Out Loud event. Supported by District 7 Probation & Parole, and multiple community partners, the January 29 event, held as a drive-thru in lieu of COVID, was touted by Renick as “a model for community partnerships.”

Thomson and Silva, who is a model of recovery in her own right, together expressed their appreciation for IDOC’s current administration and their willingness to think outside-of-the-box when assisting folks with a successful reentry. It’s noticeable, both agreed, that there has been a person-centered- vs. agenda-centered change.

“People’s chances increase by the amount of support you put around them,” shared Thomson, excited by the amount of support established going into the 3rd annual Recover Out Loud Event.

Learn more about Renick and his efforts @ Systemic Change Of Idaho and imsihopecommunityphaseii.com.
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A BOOK REVIEW

Previous: First Amend This!: An IDOC Newsletter, Jan 2021
Authored by Sheila Bruno

“Desperate for support to help her resolve the psychological disorders that had crept into her marriage, Sheila looked for support groups that dealt with the after-effects of incarceration. To her dismay, their weren’t any. So, she created one: the Wife After Prison Support Group. Sheila has reached over 40,000 people in her quest to raise awareness of Post-Incarceration Syndrome. She has made it her mission to provide education about the devastating effects prison has on their loved ones.”

An easy, enlightening read, to include discussions of faith and lessons learned from rushing into a marriage with a partner who’s spent 30 years in prison. An experience that allows Sheila help others understand the effects prison has on personal development. One of the very few books to be found in the IMSI library that helps to realize how the stunting of one’s interpersonal- and emotional growth in prison can affect others for years following their release.

For more on Sheila’s nonprofit organization and support network, visit wifeafterprison.com.
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INMATE SERVICES AT WORK

1-26-21

Dear Program Manager Jeff Kirkman:

Greetings! My quest to uncover programs and resources has destined our entanglement.

Yes, I did ask my case manager. She gave me a printout for the IDOC One Stop Reentry Center and a few short paragraphs summarizing the Department’s in-facility cognitive offerings and pre-release programs. Frankly, I was hoping for more.

So I wrote the IDOC One Stop Reentry Center requesting information on their partnerships and service. I was less than delighted to receive no response.

Not to be dissuaded, I directed my attention towards the Restoring Promise Initiative. An initiative my case manager was not aware of, despite Director Tewalt’s recent mention to our inmate population (in partnership with the Vera Institute and MILPA). “What the hell are you doing in Idaho?” was the topic of the letters I sent to New York and California. “Is it something our facility residents might make use of?”

Nothing.

And then–somewhere along the way I was spotted for ambition. Though I can’t say exactly what behavior they’re rewarding, becoming a shaman for the Cult of Sexual Anarchy is now somehow running unopposed for The-Things-One-Can-Do-In-Max-Prison.

Supposing I might convince you that literature detailing correctional enrichment opportunities has its benefits, and supposing you’d be inspired to include correctional partnerships and resources in some kind of JPay presentation, or, possibly, pamphlet, I ask that you not hold against me an assist in dissemination. For if one were to base their assumptions strictly on the evidence, lending a hand is just something I do.

Many thanks.

In friendship and incarceration,
Patrick Irving 82431
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A MESSAGE TO RESIDENTS

by Director Josh Tewalt

What a year 2020 was. I’m not going to dwell on all the challenges we faced this year. We experienced it, and honestly, going through it once was more than enough. But I want to take a moment to give thanks, and maybe even offer a bit of hope for what lies ahead in 2021.

First of all, the pandemic required everyone to behave in new ways and I express my deep appreciation to those of you who jumped into action to make more than 55,000 masks to help keep everyone at IDOC safe. You produced enough masks that we were able to donate thousands to local community agencies too. We also had people stepping up to learn how to use new sanitizing foggers and take on additional cleaning duties. Everyone rolled with the punches, including moves that allowed us to create dedicated housing units to better manage the pandemic. I know it’s been especially hard to have movement in the facilities limited and to not have in-person visitation, and I thank you for cooperation. We’re currently working with the state epidemiologists to plan for the COVID-19 vaccine to rollout in the first quarter of 2021.

While COVID-19 has taken front and center, I assure you, a lot of activity has been going on behind the scenes, which will move us forward by leaps and bounds in 2021. This year, IDOC committed to a new vision for our agency that aims to create a safer Idaho while having fewer people in its correctional system. Why am I telling you this? Because it means we see our job as helping each of you learn the skills you will need to be successful when you leave our jurisdiction: We are all safer when more people are living crime-free in the community.

To help meet this goal, we have invested in infrastructure to bring wifi and tablets to each facility for resident education and programming. We have been working with Boise State University to create a degree-granting track for students (and the feds just reinstated Pell grants to help pay for college for people who are in prisons!). We have partnered with the Vera Institute and MILPA to participate in the Restoring Promise Initiative, which seeks to overhaul the correctional experience for young adults through the use of a peer community. We are currently assessing our practices for incarcerated women so that we can provide help and support that is more targeted to the unique needs of women. We have invested $4.5M in Connection and Intervention Stations in the community, which offer supportive services for people on supervision to help prevent revocation.

This is just a sampling of what you’ll see rolling out in 2021. And, you have an important role to play in all of this: it’s imperative that you tell us what’s working, what’s not hitting the mark, and how we can continue to improve (preferably in a constructive way). We’ll be rolling out more ways to involve you and your loved ones in these conversations in 2021.

There’s a lot more to come in 2021. In the meantime, I wish you all a Happy New Year!
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SUGGESTION BOX

It is suggested that, in recognition of Black History Month, IDOC commit to incorporating Juneteenth into their list of holiday meal celebrations, the way that Idaho Correctional Center used to when it was privately operated by then-Corporate Corrections of America.

That is all.
…

We agree. All Americans deserve meal celebrations.

What did you say to me, February!?

“Rosa Parks”
— Outkast

Next: First Amend This!: An IDOC Newsletter, Mar. 2021

The Profile WriteAPrisoner.com Doesn’t Want You To See!!!

It’s hard not to have fun with this space–be creative and spontaneous, self-deprecating and clever. “You’re too much, guy,” says the soulless wonder behind the desk that always gives me the DENIED. “The world is different now! We’re in a GD’n pandemic. We understand that you’re a wonderful lover, but this isn’t the forum for hypersexual pleading. You need to tone it down.”

I get it, I do. Thanks to my experience with numerous support groups “–and how they like to phone my family during every session’s end, to congratulate them on speaker for my rightful disowning.

Inching my way now closer to modesty…

Perhaps, it’s suggested, I could pinch it off at homely.

…Shying away from my talents and creative debonair, it’s imperative that I divert your attention from search engines and news, where I’m not recognized so much for my bylines arriving as I am the decisions that won me a trophied indicting…

Something conversational, of course, like everyone recommends.

I could talk about getting evicted from a prison on the Mexican border because the corporation running it couldn’t handle my demands.

Though it’s probably best to avoid getting weird.

I guess I’ll just go with the first thing that comes to mind.

“Hi. I’m Patrick. And my lawyer doesn’t appreciate you talking to me directly through my brain.”

Boom.

Nailed it.

Creator of: Book of Irving 82431, First Amend This!: An IDOC Newsletter, How To Get Evicted From Prison.

Pen Pal Not-So-Funnies, No. 1

1-26-21

Dear Pen Pals,

I suspect I owe you an apology. Sometimes, the people and materials I’m exposed to rub off on me inappropriately, and inspire me to offend the few still kind enough to talk to me by assaulting their audience with inappropriate letters. I believe it was November that I was overindulging in the antics of deeply troubled lunatics, which prompted a round of meant-for-volley missives with the hopes of yielding laughs and the intent to entertain. I’m now of the impression that, entertaining, they were not. More than a matter of insufficient translation, poor decisions have been made. This can be acknowledged.

The thought that I’ve offended you troubles me deeply. Please accept my sincerest apologies.

I miss and love you much. I hope that all is well.

Short-bus emoji,
Patrick

The Good of Intentions: A F*ckin’ Bad-Ass Children’s Story

Patrick had all the intentions in the world.

And it had only taken him 41 years to collect them.

Some came from friends, many came from family. And others were showered at the top of each hour from bad-management-practicing people with power. He couldn’t count them all, he had so many. It was even hard to keep track of which ones were his own.

Patrick made it a habit of taking the intentions and categorically placing them discreetly in boxes. From there, he’d wrap them in reels of casual excuses, and using ribbons and tape and details and dates, forever tie their owners to their alternate realities and atypical neuroses with crafty gold bows.

All of which went with him wherever her went, for in the event that he found himself bored in the least, he could pageant their magic from the Attic of Memory and impregnate the future with lawful offending.

But lugging all day others people’s intentions, year after year, wasn’t all fun and games. Because Patrick by nature was minded for business, and in all of Patrick’s personal experience, all that goddamn motherfucking intentions had ever been good for was bogging progress down. Even the cutest little forms of stagnated pretense, no matter how innocent their origins did seem, when left out to age under the time-tested sun, frightfully blossomed into chancres of ass.

Fortunately, as discovered by the Heathens of Visceral Results, an integral part of evolution is stress.

And so it was stress that spoke directly to Patrick, and not some old, angry, celestial trucker with a talkie hot-wired right into his brain. And stress it was that purposed and proffered new direction by gracefully bestowing all the makings of plan. And not just any plan, but a capitalist one. Super fuckin’ sweet it was, awesome and simple–like when the Aztecs invented pinwheels for their roller skates to hypnotize in battle.

You see, with humans all conditioned for prepackaged sentiment–thanks to memes and emojis and swipe-a-like whores–stale intentions would liven the gypsy-piker marketplace, where, nicely polished in assurance and promise, those filthy rodents aching for a making would have the cheese to mate their call.

And that, of course, was just the beginning.

For in streamlining his harvest of secondhand bullshit, he could supply all walks of incompetence impractical excuses to pardon their own laziness with bold, pious balls.

In summary, not only would Patrick be banking some nickels, but he was bound to enjoy some shits and giggles along the way.

Which was important to Patrick, because Patrick’s interest wasn’t fully monetary. For no amount of money can buy pedestrian happiness or expunge from one’s record their arsons completely. Mostly he just wanted one day with a secluded garage and some weed to help him snooze until the car ran out of gas.

As far as wishes go, this wasn’t one for a genie: just the aforementioned nickels with shits and giggles would call it a day.

But, of course, brought with self-termination and all its appeal, several issues at length the fucking ethicists posed. Fortunately, Patrick found that these, too, could be solved with the power of intention. So long as he left behind some formal proclamation describing a lifelong conviction to abide by moral code, at least one make-believe master of just-for-Patrick’s universe would offer absolution from the hell that surfed his wake.

But, just in case, and considered good measure, always the frugal practitioner in business and logic, he’d find a way to include the same lint-crusted excuse that people have pulled from their pockets since they learned the word–

Shit.

Sorry kids.

I really wanted to key out a few characters and finish this story, but wouldn’t you know it?–I didn’t have time.

Fortunately for you, my intentions were good.

Probably even gooder that fucker Roald Dahl’s.

“Teach Your Children”
— Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young